From the Assistant Bishop
Reflecting on a tough year
The Rt Revd David Bassett, Assistant Bishop
Late last year my world changed dramatically. It began with a call from my GP. “David, your PSA levels are high. I want you to do another blood test to check if it’s just an anomaly or something else.”
I’d love to say that the sensible, controlled, level-headed person that I am took that in my stride and calmly went about getting the next test and not filling my head with doomsday scenarios! I am so thankful for a very wise and sensible wife, Susan!
This year began for me with many new experiences. MRI, biopsy, PET scans (two in one day as the radioactive material somehow didn’t disperse properly). Yes, I had developed prostate cancer (I joined the 1 in the 1 in 5 statistic of Australian men). Mid-March I had a radical prostatectomy. The pathology showed that the cancer was fully contained in the prostate and my prognosis is very, very good.
It’s been a rollercoaster ride! There are so many things to which I am extremely thankful: a thorough GP, access to world class medical care, support of family, colleagues and friends, the prayers of many, offers of help and support from so many, hearing other people’s experiences of prostate or other cancer. There have been the lows as well: worry and fear, facing the unknown, recovery from surgery, the body not healing as fast as I would like, learning that things are different now, feeling I was not ‘pulling my weight’ in work.
There are a number of things that have been a great help to me during this time: the love and care of family and friends, knowing many have been praying for me, the support of the episcopal team and office in managing my workload, the conversations with others who have walked this before me, just to name a few.
One of the very real blessings has been that my faith and confidence in God has been such a solid support. I have been very aware that the habits that are part of my normal life – daily prayer, reading scripture, listening to sermons and talks online, reading Christian books – became the support structure that helped me continue to trust in the Lord even when I was going through darker periods.
I was struck one Tuesday when doing Tuesday morning prayer from our prayer book. The prayer after you read the psalms, which I know I must have read hundreds of times before, struck me with such force and freshness.
God of grace, we thank you for all your gifts to us: grant us to accept both pain and joy in faith and hope, and never to fail in love to you and to our sisters and brothers; through Jesus Christ your Son our Lord. Amen.
Giving thanks to God for the gift of both pain and joy – it is only because we know that God is with us and has promised to never leave us that we can see this as a gift. A gift as it enables me to accept and trust not only God’s love more deeply, but also the love and compassion of others around me. A gift as it draws me closer to God. A gift as it sparked deep, deep conversations with Susan, my family and others. A gift because I needed to fully rely on others and God.
This prayer was also so helpful in that while it acknowledged the reality that I was in a period of hardship it reminded me that even then I was still called to continue to love God and my sisters and brothers. The prayer helped me to lift my eyes off myself and see others. And that too continues to be a gift.
I have also reflected often over these last seven or so months on the well know Psalm 23. I do love green pastures, but I was reassured often that even though I walk through the valley … I fear not … God is with me … his rod and staff comforting me. Another gift in knowing more deeply of God’s faithfulness and promise.
There were times when I was like the psalmist who prayed Be swift to hear me, O Lord, for my spirit fails (thankfully the psalmist does not stop there) O let me hear of your merciful kindness in the morning, for my trust is in you (Psalm 143.7-8).
I’m still on the journey of recovery, and very mindful of how blessed I am and so thankful for God’s goodness. I am also so much more aware of what others go through and so I endeavor to show more love and care and understanding, and to be prayerful, praying that we will all see God’s grace in all things.